Long Time, No See (WG, BBW)

Long Time No See

"Hurry up Jasmine, we're going to be late", yelled my mother from outside my door.

"I'm coming! Just give me a couple more minutes", I yelled back as I stalled for time. There has to be something in here that still fits.

"Ok. Just be quick! I'll be in the car!"

Dammit. I'm running out of time. Not like it matters anyway. I know nothing in here fits. I've already tried on everything and they're all too tight. My jeans constrict my thighs, my shorts barely fit over my butt and my dresses all make me look bloated. I walk through the field of scattered clothes on my floor and make my way into the hallway. I look around; suspiciously peeking my head out from behind the corner.

"Mom!", I called out to make sure she wasn't still in the house. After getting no response, I moved down the carpeted corridor, tip-toed into my mother's room and slid inside. I made my way to the dresser she kept her pants in and opened it. I pulled a pair of black slim-fit (with slim being a relative term in this case) jeans and held them up in front of me. They looked huge compared to my clothes, but my clothes didn't fit anymore. I already knew the truth, but didn't want to admit it to myself. With a chill in my spine, I stepped into the pants one leg at a time. No pushing, no jumping, no struggle. They slipped right on. I looked at the mirror across from me and examined them. They were a perfect fit.

Now wearing my mother's jeans, a hand-me-down shirt from my older brother, and a one-piece bathing suit that functioned as a poor excuse for a girdle, I made my way downstairs to meet my mom in the car.

I hopped in the passenger seat beside her and did my best to avoid eye contact. "What took you so long?", she asked.

"Just had to find the right outfit", I told her.

"Of course. Silly me. I remember being your age. But I don't know who you're trying to impress. We're only visiting family".

She may not have known, but I did: Nikki and Raina, my supermodel-caliber cousins. I really don't want them to see me like this. I haven't seen either of them since last summer, and let's just say I look quite a bit different than I did back then.

I'm sure you've been able to tell by now that I've put on a decent amount weight. I wouldn't say I'm fat per-say, but I'm definitely not skinny anymore. What can I say? That Freshman 15 is a b*tch. Or was it the Freshman 20? 25? 30? You know what, let's not get caught up in the details. Long story short, I've gotten chubby. Very much so, actually. I look myself over quickly as a reminder of how much I've put on. My thighs are wide; more like sausages than the pencils they used to be, gently squishing against each other on the hot pleather car seats. My belly now pools in my lap like a dollop of chocolate pudding on a plate; round, soft, and jiggly. Most of the weight I can't see, but I know where it is. I'm sitting on it. Let's save the description of my mountain-sized rear-end for later. I'd like to at least get moving before wanting to throw myself out the car into oncoming traffic.

"Well, whoever you're trying to impress, I'll sure you'll wow them. Your outfit looks fantastic! Are those new jeans?"

Oh God, kill me now.

After a long as hell drive in a hot as hell car, we finally make it. The family reunion. My mom is quick to get out of the car, but I hesitate. I really don't want to be seen. I know what everyone will think. " Jazzy gotten so fat", "She's really let herself go", "Is she pregnant?" "Looks like someone's been enjoying herself a little too much at college".

"Come on Jazzy", my mom knocked on the car door window to rush me out. I get up slowly and follow her out to the parking lot with my head down. I try to be as inconspicuous as possible. Just as I think we can get across the lot without being seen, I hear my mother shout "Hey Lyndon, over here!" My palm immediately goes to my face as I curse my luck and my mother for being such a Chatty Kathy.

Uncle Lyndon came over with his three sons; Jesse, Tyler, and Jermaine. All four of them were pretty big guys, so I'm sure they wouldn't mention anything about my weight. My mom and Lyndon started talking while I went over to the boys. Before I could even get I word in, I hear Jesse say "Damn girl! What happened to you?" I blushed instantly. Was it really that noticeable?

"Yeah, I'm finally starting to see the family resemblance", said Tyler as he poked my belly. I could feel his finger sink into my doughy flesh.

"Well, you know what they say about the Freshman 15", I tried to play it off.

"15? More like 30, 45. They must be feedin' you real good at that private college", said Jesse. "I bet they got real nice food there. Like gourmet or shit".

Just then Jermaine slapped Jesse in the back of the head. "Don't you know you're never supposed to talk about a woman's weight. I apologize for my idiot brothers. They act like they wasn't raised right. You look lovely as always Jazzy".

"Thank you Jermaine. Some people just don't know how to treat a lady", I said, staring daggers into the two idiots.

"Is there a lady around here? I don't see her. Can you point her out for me Jazz", said Tyler as he made binoculars with his hands and started looking around.

"Fuck you nigga", I laughed as I playfully shoved him.

"Told you she wasn't no lady. Yo, I'm hungry", Tyler said as he patted his meaty belly. "Y'all wanna get something to eat?"

"I really shouldn't. I'm on a diet", I lied.

"Yeah right. Your ass ain't get that big off carrot sticks", said Jesse. When you get fat, everyone's a comedian.

"Fine. Now that you mention it, I am kind of hungry. What's here?"

"Same stuff as alway. You know, the works", responded Jermaine.

I did know the works. I knew them well. All the food you could possibly want, made by the best cooks in the family. Hot dogs, hamburgers, chicken (fried, jerk, and barbecue), curry, roti, Mac & cheese, potato salad, beef patties, collard greens, beef tips, ox tail, lo mein, cook-up rice, rum cake, sweet potato pie, cornbread, pudding (bread, rice, and banana), fried plantains, candied yams, and so much more! I'm salivating just thinking about it. Today is going to end badly, but lord will it be fun.

I had to snap myself back to reality so we could actually get something. So me and my three portly relatives walked deeper into the park and found a table in the picnic area. The smell of the food was euphoric. Seeing the meat cooking on the grill made my stomach grumble with anticipation. After claiming our territory, we all made our way up to the serving table. Aunt Lucille and Aunt Winnie were dishing everything out. I was last in line and saw the other three pile their plates up high with all types of fattening food. I cursed myself in advance, since I knew I would end up with just as much food on my plate. I got a big helping of lo mein, two fried chicken legs, three jerk chicken wings, a barbecue chicken breast, some curry goat, a cheeseburger, roti, and collard greens (which was 60% bacon and pork belly). "Wow girl, you sure brought your appetite today", said Lucille as I kept asking for more food.

"Shush you old bag", said Winnie as she hit Lucille with her serving spoon. "Jasmine's a growing young girl. She's gotta eat to keep her strength up. And you know the boys like a girl with a little more junk in the trunk anyway", she said as she swung her hips to emphasize. I blushed again and gave back a sheepish smile in return. Winnie was a big woman; 300 lbs or so. I'm nowhere near having her level of "junk in the trunk" (which is more like a dumpster in the back of a pick-up truck), but I certainly don't want to imagine it getting to that point. If she's saying I'm eating well, then I'm clearly eating way too much.

The four of us set down our food and got some drinks. Soda, sweet tea, lemonade, kool-aid, beer; a whole bunch of options. I went with my usually Cherry Coke and made my way back to the table where the boys were already eating. I sat down my couch-cushion-rump on the bench and took a whiff of the food. It was heavenly. I was savoring every moment, building up my excitement for the meal to come.

"Are you just gonna smell the food or eat it", said Jesse as he broke me out of my reverie. They were all looking at me. I felt embarrassed, so I just started shoveling food down one mouthful at a time. I plowed through the noodles and greens, taking intermediate gulps of coke as I went. I wrapped the goat in the roti and ate it like a West Indian-Style Burrito. I stripped the meat right off the bone of the chicken legs. God, they were so good. It was all so good. I couldn't get enough. Each piece of food was quickly devoured, leaving nothing but bones in my wake. I could see my cousins looking on in awe, but I didn't care. All I cared about was the food in front of me. As I was halfway through my final morsel (the barbecue chicken breast), I heard a high-pitched voice ring out from behind me "Oh my god Ray, I didn't know Kim Kardashian was a member of our family!"

Crap!

I felt my heart sink into my chest as the two slender women sat on either side of me. I froze, still holding the half-eaten chicken up to my mouth. Nikki took her spindly arm and wrapped it around my shoulder. "How ya doing cousin?", she asked with that million dollar smile on her oh-so-punchable face.

How was I doing? Not only had my biggest nightmare come true, but in the most embarrassing way possible. The two of them looked stunning as always, while my face was covered in grease and barbecue sauce. I could suddenly feel all the weight in my stomach. I had eaten way too much. I saw the bloating under my ragged, old flannel. I felt fat and I looked fat. So needless to say, I wasn't doing very well at the moment.

I swallowed hard, getting rid of all the chewed-up chicken meat which had been bulging my cheeks. "I'm good", I lied as I wiped my face clean with the back of my hand. "How are you two?"

"Oh, you know. Same old, same old. The modeling career is really starting to take off. I was actually supposed to have a photo shoot today in 'New York' (I really hate how she always enunciates New York like it's such a big deal), but I wasn't going to miss an opportunity to see my favorite baby cousin", she said as she pinched my face (By the way, she's only three years older than me).

"And boy is there a lot more of you to see", piped in Raina as she went to poke my belly. Her finger hit and felt like a gunshot. My stomach wasn't soft and squishy like it was when Tyler did it earlier. It was hard and tight like a drum. There was no give at all and the added pressure hurt like a bitch. "Damn girl, that's solid. Are you pregnant or something?"

Nikki threw Raina a dirty look before saying, "You know she's not pregnant dipshit. Lesbians can't get pregnant. It's like against science or whatever".

"No, I'm pretty sure she's pregnant; with a food baby", they both laughed at my expense. "I mean, that's quite the tanker you've got there", she said while patting my belly. "If I rub it, will it give me good luck?"

"Ha ha, very funny", I said with as much sarcasm as I could muster. It was best to just act like my regular, snarky self even though I wanted to crawl into a cave and never come out. "At least I'm enjoying my food. What did you two twigs eat today?"

"Clearly not as much as you big girl", said Nikki with that with that same condescending look she always gave. "But hey, that's the price you have to pay to not have an a** the size of Mercury."

"The car or the planet?", asked her airhead sister.

"God Ray, you missed the point. I wasn't being literal", Nikki said as she face-palmed at Raina's stupidity."But does it matter? Both are huge."

"Go ahead. Get it all out", I said while desperately wanting this interaction to be over.

"Sorry Jazz, but can you blame us? You're huge!" Nikki said loud enough for everyone around to hear. "I mean how much do you weigh? It's gotta be 180 at least."

"Well, actually, it's...", I said before being cut off by Raina slipping her hand into my back pocket.

"This thing's gotta be 100 lbs. easy (It isn't. Just thought I would let you know that). And we're not even counting this big ol' gut", she said while shaking my belly by the love handles. I felt so queasy that I thought I might throw up all over the table. Luckily, I kept down every delicious bite of food I swallowed today. It did cause me to burp though, which was just as bad. I felt all the color flush out of my face, which is no easy task for a black girl, as I froze in my seat. My embarrassment had petrified me, leaving me with my mouth wide open and my jaw on the floor. Did that just happen? Did I just burp in front of Nikki and Raina?

"Burping and stuffing your face. You're starting to become quite the little piggy, aren't you?", Nikki said while tip-toeing her spider-like fingers across my back. "Well anyway, it's been real. We'll catch up with you later my wittle chunka-whunka." She kissed me on the cheek and walked away, Raina followed and I watched both their perfectly shaped Apple-bottom asses swing seductively in unison. I remember when my ass looked like that.

Now that they we're gone, my attention shifted to my male cousins. I glared at them and said, "What the hell guys?! No one wanted to help me out?"

"What were we going to do?", said Jermaine with a shrug.

"They weren't exactly lying. You are kind of a pig", said Jesse.

"Well that's the pot calling the kettle black, isn't it fat boy?", I shot back with more venom than the black Spider-Man symbiote.

"Aw, someone doesn't like being called a fatty. I thought you were Miss Big & Bad. Can't handle a little teasing?"

"I can handle teasing. I just thought my niggas would have my back. That's all. I can take a joke".

"Sure you can. And I can fuck Beyoncé.", said Jesse as he continued to throw me serious amounts of shade.

"I can take whatever you throw at me. Bring it on. Hit me with your best shot", my pride and desire to remain too cool for school took over. I knew I wasn't going to win this, but I couldn't back down and look like a bitch.

"Looks like we got ourselves a roast then.", he said as he stood up and climbed on top of the table. Jesse then shouted out to the crowd, "Yo! Who wants to see Jazzy get roasted by yours truly?" He got an overwhelming cheer from the audience. Maybe I wasn't as loved in this family as I thought I was. "So you accept the challenge Thunder Thighs?"

I really should say no. He's got way too much ammunition against me. But I am the reigning, defending champion of cutting ass; so I had to accept. I ponderously lifted myself into a standing position and joined Jesse on the table top. "I accept. And when I'm done with you, you're going to wish you never called me fat". After feeling the table creak under our combined weight, I leaned over and whispered to him, "Maybe we should get off the table first"

"Good idea"

*Now, for those of you who don't know what roasting or cutting ass is, it's basically like a rap battle with jokes; where the two participants go back and forth insulting each other until the crowd chooses a winner. Now that we've got that little lesson out of the way, let the battle begin.

I did my best to keep up my confident exterior, but could feel myself crumbling on the inside. Having everyone point and laugh while being barraged with insults about your weight would be hard on anyone. Every well-landed joke broke a small piece off of my already fragile self-esteem. If this went on much longer, I wouldn't have any left. I had to find an out before I completely shattered.

"I know Sir Mix-A-Lot said he liked a baby with back; but you got back, front, sides, top, bottom. Damn girl, you the whole circumference!", Jesse yelled as he hit me with another blow. Everyone was still getting a kick out of it. The fuckers. "C'mon, give us a little dance. My anaconda don't, my anaconda don't!"

I dug deep and brought out all the bravado I could muster, knowing it was my only chance at survival. "Please, you ain't got no anaconda. This boy's got a corn snake between his legs", I said while pointing at his junk. "And I know you ain't talking about somebody's weight. I'm not even gonna mention the fact that you look like Rick Ross ate the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man", that one got a good response, "I'm a talk about your girls, the few you can get anyway. Let's just say plus size is a generous term. You only ever get laid if you promise the fat bitches candy afterwards." Everyone in the crowd was dying. I was doing it. I was fighting through. I felt like Rocky. I looked over at Jesse and could see him shaking. I had him on the ropes, but knew I'd only last one more jab before a knockout. We both knew what needed to happen.

We made eye contact, nodded, and then came in for a shake and a hug. Just like that, all the tension was broken and everybody laughed the whole thing off. It was squashed and settled, which was all good for me. I don't know what I would have done if I lost that final sliver of ego. But still, the whole thing made me feel really insecure. I knew he didn't mean anything by it, but I also knew there was truth in everything he said. That's why everyone was laughing so hard. They were laughing 'at' me, not with me. Haha, let's all laugh at the fat girl. Isn't her ass just hilarious? Look at that big funny belly of hers. God, I just want to sink into a hole. Yeah, like I'd even fit inside. My muffintop would leave me stuck halfway down. Wouldn't that be fucking hysterical?

This whole experience have been a little more than I can handle. I need to get away for a while. I walked towards the edge of the park and slumped down under a tree. I was still obscenely full from earlier. I leaned against the tree and took my bloated belly in my hands. I finally had and opportunity to just relax and decompress. I slowly started rubbing my hand over it. It felt good. As I gently soothed my stomach, I could feel all my troubles slip away. I wasn't thinking about how fat I was, I wasn't thinking about embarrassing myself in front of everyone. All I was thinking about was how good it felt to stroke my turgid tummy in the shade. I closed my eyes and let my hand do all the work as a silently slipped into Neverland. My eye lids felt heavy as the effects of such a big meal started to kick in. The drowsiness overcame me as I passed out under the tree with my hand still placed firmly on my middle. Regardless of what else happened today, I was at peace now; and that's all that mattered.